Tips To Help Ease The Pain
I am pretty confident that this subject, while having been discussed in our home before, is one that will not be put into practical use for many years. Many, many years. If my husband has his way it would be never. That subject would of course be sexual activity in teens and young adults. Shocked ya, right? 🙂 While many parents dread having it, “The Talk” is probably the most important thing you could share with your teen before they become teens. I believe that having an honest and open relationship with your kids is vital to their growth into strong, independent adults with healthy attitudes about things like sex. How else can we expect the next generation to procreate responsibly?
We all know that knowledge is power and parents need to ensure their teens are equipped with the right information, especially if they will soon be leaving home or heading off to college or university. To help make both parents and kids feel at ease, TROJAN™ has some great suggestions for making “The Talk” a breeze:
1) Be proactive and approachable. Take opportunities that come up in everyday life, like sexual situations on the TV or even better, in movies, to let your kids know that they can come to you to ask questions or get your advice. Don’t be afraid to start the conversation by asking candid, yet discreet questions. While my daughter is now just 12 years old, the school started the whole “sex ed” thing at the end of Grade Four. Yes, Grade Four. Emily was just ten at the time. I took the bull by the horns and let her go wild with her questions. While they were pretty benign, they were the perfect introduction to what was to come over the next year. It’s important to be honest about your values and expectations for your kids’ behaviour, but also try to be positive in supporting decisions that your kids will ultimately have to make for themselves.
2) Educate yourself. If you want to become more knowledgeable about the sexual health issues that are likely relevant to your kids, there are plenty of resources available. The Society of Obstetricians and Gynecologists of Canada website http://www.sexandu.ca/ offers information on many different aspects of sexuality and sexual health. Your kids may think you’re going overboard, but why not show this site to them and even walk through parts. Depending on your kiddos age they may want to check things out on their own, but by introducing them to the site you will show them just how important this is to you.
3) Share credible resources with your kids. This goes hand in hand with educating yourself first. Send your kids links to credible information on the web. For the older teen or young adult, check out weknowsex.ca (a website developed by the makers of TROJAN™ condoms and the Sex Information Education Council of Canada). If you would like to make sure your son or daughter has comprehensive, but readable information on sexually transmitted infections (STIs), the Public Health Agency of Canada’s STI resource is excellent. Check them out!
4) For the college kid. It’s important for parents to be aware that the majority of university and college kids are sexually active [1]. If that includes your kids, it’s important that they protect themselves against STIs and unwanted pregnancy. If you’re comfortable with it, slipping a box of condoms into their next care package, a la Modern Family, will not only send the powerful message that you are tuned-in to their lives, but that you also have their best interests at heart. While some parents will balk at doing this, you can bet your young adult kid will thank you and you might just sleep a bit better at night. 🙂
As many families are preparing to take their kids to college for the first time or are returning to university for the second or third year, there will be a lot of preparation. Make sure your kid’s knowledge of their own sexual health and responsibility are a part of it. Good luck!
How old do you think a child should be when you have “The Talk” with them?
FT&PD
Suz
Disclaimer: I am a part of the 2015 Church and Dwight Ambassador Team, but all opinions expressed are my own.
Keeping communication open, and often…..most helpful! My boy is 17, we’ve had lots of discussions over the years….
My son is still young so I’m apprehensive about when the day comes. I’m glad there are resources for us to turn to! Thanks for sharing these links.
Have had the talk with the oldest and these links are very helpful for the future, thanks!
I think the most important tip you have listed is educate yourself. I think it’s so important to have the facts before this happens. I have heard of courses parents can take that teach them the slang and whatever else the kids these days are into. You can bring the kids and that way you have someone knowledable teaching you everything and giving you facts. It also opens up conversation.
Great advice! Thanks!
Thanks for reading!
You have me skirming in my skin. Nope I haven’t but thank you for the reference because the time is coming soon :S Bookmarking this!
I am a very open Mom! I’m not afraid being caught undressed, or answer any question my kids will ask. Having a back ground in Kinesiology, I tend to approach things from a biological way rather than social, but between that and my churches guidance, I don’t have a problem talking about sex with my kids.
I remember having the talk witth my daughter… I think some kids know much more than they let on while others dont and think they do! Its an important taalk and one where you can impart family values or reinforce them.
Right on. Education is power. Talk openly and honestly for a child’s entire life and he will be better prepared to make his own safe decisions.
I was extremely open with my daughters when they were growing up. They all came to me before they actually had sex and I would always have condoms available for them. I didn’t endorse them having sex, but I know that teenagers do have sex, just like I did when I was one!
Yes,it’s so important to discuss this with your children before they become teens !